Chapter 1
The road that
you took and the path you traveled.
The
compact car slowly climbed the switch backs on the steadily
rising road. They had been driving for some time, it always
seemed up hill. Darker now and where the forest thinned,
fog cascaded around them and overtook the car. Fall was in
the air, more noticeable in the mountains than the valleys
below.
The wind
picked up and whipped dry leaves around the trees, dark and
covered with moss and lichen. The car rocked through the
ruts and Lt. Bendix briefly noticed the changing season and
sank back into thought. Thru his mind ran fragments of
sentences and glimpses of a familiar face, almost like
flashes in a dark room. One face came clearly into view.
Peculiar,
he thought, that some distant memories so long put away, can
return so vividly. He saw the face of his father, weather
worn with lines from a difficult life, he saw his hands,
strong yet scared by hard work, and he heard his voice,
always clear and strong, practical and warm, familiar.
Submerged
in this deep pool of memories of his father and fragments of
what he said, Bendix thought this an odd recollection to
return at this moment but he had always loved his father -
the words he had spoken were true, without contradiction,
always simply the truth and that voice and those truths were
always with him. A conversation they had had when he
finished his college years. Simple and clear words to
always keep near when decisions are made.
Bendix
wondered why this particular memory should return so
clearly, three full years after he had made a fateful
decision.
Yes … the
three years had flown by! He made that decision to put on
the uniform perhaps with a few doubts but what ever
arguments may have raced thru his mind - that is where they
remained. Echoing now, always that clear voice when it came
to big decisions. You make a choice and it will effect the
course of your life. In this case, he knew it would not be
a comfortable civilian career, quite the contrary, for these
troops, life could be rather uncomfortable. These thoughts
coursed thru his mind as the little car snaked up the hills.
Always his father’s simple guidance.
Momentarily returning to the present, the Lt. glanced over
at his young driver, really not much more than a fresh faced
boy with his military cap pushed to the back of his head -
certainly not regulation and he really should make a
correction. Bendix paused and said nothing. It really is a
small offense he thought, but as young as this soldier was,
he had been in Border Company longer than he. A harsh
correction might lead to the wrong impression and once they
got to the barracks, the talk among the troops might easily
be that the new Lt. was difficult to deal with; this could
happen even before Bendix unpacked his suitcase.
A young East German Lieutenant on Commissioning Day at the
Academy.
We have added a few stock images to enhance the text.
So, he
remarked to the driver, something of little importance about
the mountainside nature surrounding them as the car creaked
along and he sank back into thought. He considered his
past, even as a young man, he realized there was nothing too
special about what had brought him to this day and place.
His life
had really been nicely average, no real struggles, no
outstanding successes, quite ordinary in fact. Like almost
everyone in his generation, a predictable path from
Kindergarten to the Young Pioneers and then FDJ; a close
family, parents that he loved, no difficulties in school -
childhood thru adolescence, a life free of remarkable
events.
Yes, Peter
Bendix had come through the Officers Academy and was
commissioned as a Lieutenant, yet even there, no truly
significant awards. He had come along this far, free of
distinct military talents or over powering ambitions. But
at his core, he knew he was a man who stood by his words and
he wanted an honorable life.
As a
student at the Academy, he had studied the books and learned
well, not every subject was easy but he applied himself to
each class. When final exams arrived, Bendix prepared,
three long years of study had led to this. Along with his
classmates, he crammed deep into the night, he concentrated
not only on the basics but went well beyond to learn what
had been at the heart of so many books, lectures and
presentations.
On their
calendars, his fellow cadets crossed off the examination day
and put the annoyances and trifling issues of military
school and training behind them. But as young men, they
could not imagine that the troubles of today even as they
pass, are just a prelude to what the future holds.
The scores
were announced and finally, it was done! What a wonderful
feeling of sudden independence, the hopes and expectations
that rose in each cadet by just seeing their name on a
list. His eyes coursed down the page then - in print:
Bendix - passing grade. These thoughts ran thru his mind as
the little car rolled along in the fog but also, a sense of
uncertainty crept in. Bendix briefly touched the window
crank, as if by sealing the car, it would keep such further
thoughts at bay.
The driver
mopped the condensation from the inside of the windshield
with his sleeve, the fog was thicker now, difficult to keep
track of this tortured road. Bendix’s thoughts likewise
were clouded. He did not want to dwell on things but two
questions occupied his thoughts: how will I be received by
the new platoon and how shall I conduct myself as a leader
and officer? The driver grunted something about the fog and
the car crept slowly thru the woods and closer to the
barracks.
All of the
study and training at the Academy and now even the dirt
trail, seemingly everything was leading him towards his
platoon. A collection of young men, similar yet each man of
different character, temperament and personality. Yes, all
different men, all dressed the same, a group that must act
as a cohesive unit in the most difficult situation. This
was something that could not be accomplished by simply being
an officer and barking out orders.
The driver
spoke and broke his train of thought - Oh crap! Now I
think it will start snowing, “ - he gripped the wheel with
two fists clenched, his whole body was pulled up to the
wheel, his nose only inches from the windshield. Not
waiting for a reply from the Lt. and not taking his eyes off
the road, he continued, yes, when we get into this set
of hills, the snow comes early and often. Behind us, in the
valleys, they are still taking in the harvest. “
Typical Trabbi similar to what would have taken Lt. Bendix
to the border barracks.
Bendix was
silent but thought in a friendly way, driver - now you are
exaggerating, it is really not that early for snow - this
part of the country, right on time, right at the end of
September. Then, maybe the trooper had read his mind, the
driver asked, “ Lieutenant, sir, do you know the altitude
of the Rhoen in this area? “
The Lt.
nodded - he had never actually hiked or trained in this
specific country but he had studied the region, read all he
could about the terrain, weather, the farms and the crops.
He wanted to understand the “ lay of the land “. This part
of the Rhoen featured high hill passes with everything in
shadows and the color of dark green pine forests, and then
suddenly mountain meadows, green grasses in the Summer and
in Winter, broad snowy fields that would not clear until
late Spring.
Yes - this
was the region of the border barracks at Frankenrode, the
weather was rough and often unpredictable and the land only
surrenders a meager harvest, or so he had read. For those
who lived here for generations, as they sat at their tables
for meals, often hunger was an uninvited guest. This seemed
a territory almost unchanged since the days of the Kaiser,
an area that would be familiar to even the long dead Tsar,
almost a Siberia , - an area suitable for banishment of
rioters, complainers and revolutionaries, an area that as
one got closer, everything else seemed ever more distant.
Nothing he had seen or read in preparation for the
assignment contradicted these impressions of a wild yet
romantic region.
A land of
contradictions, harsh and uncomfortable beauty, inhospitable
and yet, it would soon to be his home. He was sure he could
work something out but he wasn’t thinking of himself now but
rather for Kirsten. She suddenly came flooding into his
thoughts and would soon be following him on these very
roads, into that region where the states of Thuringia and
Bravaria met - where two fundamentally different worlds lay
side by side.
Impressions, images, the touch, the scent, recollections of
Kirsten momentarily washed over him. A sea of memories;
her face, her body, her voice, her spirit - all the things
that made him so happy. So many things bound her to him,
since they had first met, and he knew, they would be
together forever. He recalled with perfect clarity, the
chance opportunity when they first met.
He was in
the library on the edge of town, not an uncommon place for a
cadet when, quite by chance, he met her. He was hunting for
a copy of The Golden Rose , the collection of short stories
and essays, by Paustowskis, a friend had recommended it.
She soon came to realize, however, that perhaps it was more
than the novel that drew Peter to the library. And as time
came to pass, they ended up reading the book together and
came to realize that the story of Gold - dust was really
their own story.
The Trabbi
crested the ridge and found a clear trail, he still thought
of her, thoughts of his first and only great love, of how he
had left her behind in the city and how she had pledged to
follow as soon as possible. To clear his mind, Bendix
looked down at his gray leather gloves, then towards his
feet. The foot well of the car was silver, the paint long
worn away by hundreds of boots, hundreds of men who had
taken this ride into the high hills.
The autumn
beauty of the valleys in the sharp colors of Fall and then
the mountain country, heading towards Winter in its own
spectacular way reminded Bendix yet again of Kirsten. He
tried to focus but always it returned; accompanying the
memories, a steady drum beat of mostly unanswered
questions. As certain as he was of everything they had said
and done together in their past, the future seemed equally
uncertain. When or if she would come along and join him,
what would it be like to be together in this new, wild
region; what thoughts would occupy her mind on such a long
journey? He knew what his future held, the company, his
new platoon, service in the border troops, he worried how
she would see her future.
What could
this land hold for her, a country so distant and starkly
different from the city? He figured the border barracks at
least had a movie theater, certainly no café, no genuine
theater, and not much to read. Looking at a sudden shaft of
sunlight streaming through the tall pines dressed in snow,
he wondered where the nearest library might be.
“ Honored
Lieutenant, we have almost done it! announced the driver
with a sweeping gesture that returned his cap to a position
of relative military bearing. Following the trail, the
little car swung into a ravine, a mountain stream ran to the
side. We are now, “ said with some gravity, “ only 1500
meters from the border. “
The
soldier certainly knew his route and the landmarks. Bendix
made an effort to study the terrain, to understand this
forest cloaked in fog and darkness and yet again,
encompassed in this wild land, his thoughts returned to
Kirsten. Only six months earlier, in such a forest, on a
Spring day, yes, that was the first time they lay
together. He recalled the willows and that gentle hum of
approaching Spring.
“ Here is
where we often have problems! “ the driver reported, Do
you see this sharp turn?
Bendix was
jolted back to reality as the Trabbi lurched through the
partially washed out trail and emerged from the forest.
On both
sides of the road, harvested fields, stubble, mud and
patches of snow. In the distance, they could see how the
fields were bracketed by dark blocks of forest and then
there were other fields, winter grains standing squat and
swaying in the wind. On the near horizon, a church steeple,
then a road sign: Frankenrode.
“ Well, so
here we are, “ Bendix thought to himself, “ Slow down, let
me get a good look at things. “ he told the driver.
After all
he had read about this hard - scrabble area, what lay before
him was an interesting contrast. The distant farmhouses
and barns seemed neat and orderly no better and no worse
than any others he had seen, he could see farmers and
laborers dressed just expected, warm work clothes in shades
of blue. Two girls were walking towards them beside the
road, they smiled and waved.
On cue,
the driver pushed his cap to the rear and, with a sweeping
gesture, starting with his hand at his lips and ending with
a huge wave, he returned the greeting. Bendix noted this
and thought - so now we are back to basic uniform matters.
With little emotion he said, “ Well, I guess that is the
standard, regional greeting? “
“ Not
necessarily, Sir! “ the driver replied, “ these girls can
really be quite sweet if you take some time and don’t try to
bounce them around in the backseat of the car. The driver
said this with a broad smile and a wink as he turned to the
Lt.
So this
became the topic and Bendix continued, “ And the local girls
are happy to let you get away with all of this? “
“ Most
certainly so! “ replied the driver, “ girls are about the
same where ever you go, but these farm girls have a certain
pride. “
Bendix’s
gaze returned to the farm houses, these were sturdy
buildings, tile roofs, brick and wood construction.
Household gardens neatly laid out to the front and sides had
become aprons of Fall colors. Then, in the distance,
across the fields he saw it, the barracks.
At the
Academy, he had heard of these camps, a single, long
building, squat in the wind, untouched and unimproved since
first put up. A single chimney poked out of the middle. A
long sheet of the tar paper roof had come loose and it
snapped back and forth in the wind. The senior instructors
told story after story of duty at the border and life in
such camps, frozen in the Winter and baked in the Summer.
So that
is the border camp? “ Bendix flatly said. It was part
question and part acknowledgement of a certain fate.
“ Certain
not! “ replied the driver with a start. Our barracks is
nearby, but that, “ he gestured with his hand towards
desolate building, “ was some years back, I guess. I
believe the local Farmer Council uses it for storage. We
border troops are free of that place!”
He
maneuvered the car onto a new trail, it was well kept and
passed the last of the farm fields and then thru a stand of
pine trees. They turned a corner and the border camp
suddenly came into view. A cluster of modern buildings
neatly laid out surrounded by a fence. “ This is our
establishment! “ , the driver announced, pleased to
introduce the place and happy to be nearly done with the
chore. He pulled the hat into a proper position and
straightened behind the wheel as the car passed the gate
guards.
Bendix let
out a sigh of relief, a modern camp, better than he could
have expected and the car rolled to a halt.
Kristen - Don’t you think they make a wonderful couple?
Chapter 2
Bendix got
out and looked at the neat, functional brick building. The
way the sun struck the windows, he could see curious faces
looking at him but no further detail. So now, he thought
with a smile, they are forming their first impressions. For
a few seconds, his mind flew to the basic expectations that
had been made very clear at the Academy, he was to prove
himself a capable platoon leader and advance thru the ranks
to take increasing levels of responsibility, it all would
start in a few seconds, with a few steps and then through
that door.
He had
heard a little bit about the previous platoon leader, he was
an older Grenzer, a senior NCO who had spent over twenty
years in the border troops, certainly experienced and well
liked by the men. The unit had won several awards while he
was in charge - this was, Bendix thought, a difficult act
to follow. If he did well, he was just building on the
solid foundation already in place, anything less than that
and he had allowed the unit to slip.
He brushed
some slush from the hem of his coat, a gesture to buy just a
few more seconds and then straightened and stepped towards
the door as through back at the main parade field at
school. As he strode forward towards the building, for a
second, butterflies in his stomach - then that cleared, the
featureless faces in the windows were about to have names.
The door
suddenly swung open, an officer, tall and athletic with a
broad, friendly face stepped out. He held the door with one
hand, the other reached out towards Bendix, not much
military formality, more of a welcoming gesture. This led
to a strong handshake - and a friendly greeting.
“ Bonner,
Frank Bonner “ he said, “ I am the executive officer here
for political things, and I am also the welcoming committee.
As he spoke, he gestured to Bendix to go thru the door.
“ Welcome! - the Company Commander is waiting for you -
pleasant journey, everything OK? “
The room
was well lit between the sun streaming in and the ceiling
lights. Beyond the bright red, gold and black of the flags
and award pennants on the walls, not much color - the walls
were plaster, light beige. Maps were everywhere.
A stocky
man rose from behind the central desk, middle aged, he wore
the standard duty uniform. The Commander, greeted Lt.
Bendix in a more formal tone, they exchanged salutes - more
or less what the Lt. had visualized a hundred times in his
mind. They spoke as Bendix handed over his files.
Grenztruppen barracks at
Frankenheim, very similar to what Aue visualized as
Frankenrode.
The eyes
of the Major never left Bendix, he was clearly taking stock
of his new officer. Every sentence he said seemed measured,
every reply was carefully considered. Bendix suddenly
caught himself in what he knew was one of his nervous
reactions - he was answering simple questions with very
long, tortured replies, too long winded, it’s a conversation
- not an oral exam!
The
Commander patiently let him sputter on for a bit, a trace of
a smile came to his face and then, a brief wave of his
hand. “ So Bendix he inturrpted, “ what did you think of
that drive from the sunny valleys to here, the wild top of
the world? It’s enough to put a chill through any man. It
certainly had that effect on me, the first time I was carted
up here. “
Bendex
felt as though a refreshing breeze had passed thru the room,
he suddenly felt more at ease with the Commander, after that
brief, disarming remark. “ Well sir, I guess I will have to
get used to this altitude - 1000 meters I believe. “ he
replied.
“ Yes,
that’s it! And quickly, Major Stedler said, he was
smiling broadly, “ and you will also have to acclimate to
the Winter, it is fast upon us. It is going to be an
exciting time for you comrade. “ This was said in a
surprisingly fatherly tone. The Commander paused again,
still smiling, he took in Bendix from head to toe one last
time. But I’ll tell you, one does get used to it - the
good thing about this wild place is that it keeps the mind
alert - and the views - are wonderful.”
The Commander wanted to formally introduce Bendix to the
unit the following day. What remained of the current day
would be an informal briefing on the mission, a tour of the
area, getting quarters set - all the normal things. Stedler
drew him to a display and proudly swept his hand across a
wide swath of map explaining how the company and brigade had
been responsible for this sector for many years. And of
course, the local political organization played a key role
in the success of the unit. It consisted of a framework of
12 loyal Communist soldiers representatives - Bendix was
expected to take a lead role in the group.
“ Let’s
see the rest of this building then I’ll show you around our
little barracks area. “ the Major said as he led down the
corridor. In rapid order, they passed the office and living
area designated for the Lt; it was small, furnished,
curtains hung at the windows, then on to the common room,
the class room and finally the TV room and out the side
door. At the other end of the building were rooms for the
NCOs and troops.
First the
vehicle park, then the kennels, the dogs were excited by
anyone passing by and barked loudly, their tails thrashed in
the wind. Then down a path towards the newly built married
officer housing block.
Construction had just been completed on the pair of two
story apartment buildings and it seemed as though families
were still moving in; around the still unfinished sidewalks
and curbs lay packing boxes and cases, all the stuff of
people in motion. Nearby, a stand of massive pine trees
were silently standing guard. Bendix gave a nod and smile
towards the Major, these quarters were much better than
expected.
“ So - I
understand you’ re engaged. Have you set a date yet?”, the
Major said, sensing Bendix’s interest.
The Lt.
was surprised - guess word from the Academy travels fast, “
I … we … well, the idea of a Christmas wedding was something
we had considered … if it can be worked in with the missions
and duty schedule. “
Stedler
had turned so that he was addressing Bendex directly from
the side - measuring the Lt. again. You’d be surprised
just how busy the holiday season is up here, but I suppose a
wedding is a wedding.” He turned again and led the way back
towards the HQ building. No one spoke - just dogs barking; Bendix felt that part of the conversation had not gone
particularly well and was glad it was over.
The Major
broke the silence, “ Have you given any thought as to where
- exactly - the celebration would be? “
Caught off
guard, Bendix had hoped the wedding talk was over and it
flashed thru his mind that really, he and Kirsten had never
actually discussed the actual details of a wedding. Would
she want to do it at home with her parents - maybe Bendix’s
home town, was the barracks complex a possibility? Thinking
on his feet he said, I think up here would be a great
place, everything cloaked in snow, wonderful skiing, really
a magical place. “
A
wedding at the border barracks. “ the commander said
bringing the procession to a halt. “ We haven’t had one of
those in years! What an interesting idea! The Major
turned and again looked at the Lt. His words seemed to hang
in the air.
Silence
again, Bendix had no idea what was going on. Was his boss
joking, did Bendix appear to be nothing more than a love -
sick cadet on an outing. What ever could be going thru his
head? Three years at the Academy and less than an hour at
the camp had led to this odd silence.
Stedler
spoke, “ What would you think, as sort of a wedding present
from the men of the company, we get you the keys to one of
these new two bedroom apartments? He was smiling broadly
again. Before the Lt. could answer, the Commander
continued, “ Understand … when they modernized this
barracks, the living quarters were ’ over - built ’ but that
is because civilian apartments are difficult to come by in
this area. They really are very nice, all new but they do
lack central heating. I can have the men open an
undesignated unit and check everything, it may take a day or
two and then it will be reserved for you, assuming you
really intend to marry and your wife really wants to stay
here.” His voice trailed off, the last words were said in a
serious tone.
Bendix
couldn’t believe his luck and read nothing into the sudden
change in the Major’s voice, Yes comrade, that would a
splendid gift!”
“ Well,
your bride, “ the Major continued on, his words were
measured, “ do you really think she will share your
feelings?”
Bendix
was still missing something in his commander’s voice. “ I
am sure she would be ecstatic over the chance for a new
apartment right on the base where I will be stationed!”
Stedler
continued, “ Lieutenant - you will be surprised just how
small this place is and how the Winter just goes on and on.
He paused for a second and then began again, “ Just what
does this lovely young woman do for a career ?”
“ Comrade,
she is a librarian by training and I am quite sure she will
see all of this as a wonderful way to start a new part of
her life. “
“
Librarian, “ Stedler slowly shook his head, “ the nearest
library is in the district captial, some distance away, out
of the mountains and back in the flatlands. “
Now Bendix
began to understand why the Major sounded so serious. “ I
am sure we can find something.” The enthusiasm was draining
from his voice and some of the doubts that had so occupied
his mind on the long drive to the camp, returned.
Stedler
sensed he had made his point, “ It is not always that easy
but write to her, explain the situation and I am sure
something can be worked out. If she is agreeable, than the
apartment will be opened and checked - if a Christmas
wedding is still the plan, then it will be yours at your
request. The Major turned, the discussion was over and
departed.
Grentruppen barracks at Hermannsfeld, perhaps you prefer
this as your: Frankenrode.
Lt. Bendix
stood and considered what had just happened, such unexpected
luck to be granted a new apartment at the camp as a wedding
gift and then the sudden realization that all of this might
not at all be what Kristen hoped for. Her career was
important and the nearest library was so far away. Where
would she work, what would their life consist of in this
tiny place high in the hills? As if shaking snow off his
shoulders, Bendix dismissed these thoughts.
They will
find a way to work things out! First he would tell her of
the apartment and the unbelievable luck of it all, he would
tell the Major that of course, they would take it! Then,
before she joined him, he would learn everything related to
the job and the camp. What good fortune! Not four walls
but three full rooms newly built! A place to live, to love,
to share with his bride, under his breath with only the
trees as witness, Bendix remarked, “ You are one lucky dog!
This is the start of your adult life! “
The Lt.
returned to his tiny quarters in the administration building
and dug the remains of a sandwich out of his gear. Not much
of a supper but it really did not matter; so much was on his
mind. He lay in bed, not interested in sleep, the events of
the day spun through his mind. His driver and his cap at a
jaunty angle, the welcoming ceremony at the barracks, the
faces of the village girls on the drive out of the valleys,
the new apartments for officer families - perhaps he would
be a family man too. Frankenrode, so strange and now, oddly
familiar. The voice of Major Stedler returned again and
again - sometimes the words he heard blended with memories
of his father’s voice.
Was he
dreaming or awake? A memory returned with frightening
clarity. He was back in high school, chatting with
classmates over the professional schools they were about to
attend. He had just told them of his acceptance to the
Academy and with voices filled with youthful conviction,
they responded with hoots and jeers.
“ The
Academy! Your progression will be from lieutenant, to
captain, maybe a major if you are really lucky! A long
harsh life of a soldier, orders received and issued, not
much to see on a business card! With us it will be
different; college courses then engineering, medicine and
then the head of the clinic, the professor in front of the
class. We will be giving the orders right from the start. “
Bendix
dismissed those voice now as he had back in high school. He
made his choices because he wanted a challenge and knew full
well that the road he took led away from the enjoyments and
opportunities found in city life. His old friends knew
little of orders and discipline - he was sure that even in
their careers, there would always be bosses and
expectations. Those guys would live in a land of paper, he
had fresh clean air and comrades to his left and right. The
Academy had molded him, he was a man ready to give and
receive orders, to follow through in difficult situations,
to be at the place where the lawyer, professor and engineer
would certainly fear to be.
He knew he
would love his job, just as sure as his love of Kirsten. On
the border, one leaves certain things behind - again
Kirsten’s face flashed in his mind - what of her
professional career, what of the library, could she ever
leave that behind? He tossed and turned in a fitful sleep.
Chapter 3
The
following day, Lt. Bendix made his first trip into the
border area. He really did not think that this would be
much more than an extended hike through the Autumn woods,
but Major Stedler was already there and personally lead the
way along every sharp turn, steep trail and hidden gully in
their sector. If he was going to trust this young officer
with all the duties along the border, trust him in every
aspect of mission - then he would certainly take him by the
hand on the first day.
So they
moved through the zone, Stedler was not overly concerned
with the actual reconnaissance and only gave passing note to
what sorts of information could be gained in a particular
area. Rather, almost immediately upon reaching a new site,
he would present to Bendix, a tactical scenario, a difficult
situation involving men, equipment and the mission and then
have the Lt. present his solution and reasons for making
each decision. The Major listened to the explanations
without criticism or interruption. From time to time, he
would change some aspect of the problem and ask how new
facts might change the answer. All of this was done absent
the patronizing tone of a superior, he recalled mistakes he
had made early on in his career and how someone might
stumble thru an answer.
They
arrived at the next section of the border and the commander
presented by far, the most difficult tactical problem of the
day. The terrain was terrible, he added night was falling,
communications were bad and the platoon was short of men.
Bendix paused for a moment and then began his response. His
plan was clearly laid out, logical; the orders to the
imaginary squads were delivered in clear and concise
sentences, none of that stammering from the day before.
Stadler
listened. Had this been a response on the final exam back at
the Academy, he would have given it the highest marks,
perhaps a written note into the records as well. Clearly,
young Bendix had not only studied the manuals but could
apply the concepts to new and unique situations. The answer
was much better than anything he could have formulated as a
new Lieutenant so many years ago. Finally, he thought,
given the situation, Bendix’s orders would have very
probably led to success. With that - Stadler’s mind ran in
another direction. He was thinking less of the tactical
problems and much more of the personnel at hand and one man
in particular.
Bendix
completed his solution to the border problem and Stadler
promptly said, “ Well … if we had followed thru with your
actions at this border incident, in all probability, that
person would have gotten away. “
The
commander saw the astonished look on Bendix’s face and
continued, “ Hindsight really is 20 / 20. “ Then, to
further make his point, Errors made along the border can
have deep consequences, but even the worst situation can be
salvaged. “
Bendix
looked at his boss, “ And what about in this case? “ he
dared to ask.
Stadler
shrugged his shoulders, “ That probably is a question best
asked of your predecessor, Staff Sergeant Heimann. That old
fox is much better than I when it comes to the most
difficult border events. “
Bendix let
the words sink in and Stedler’s comments troubled him. It
seemed odd that he, the new Lieutenant, should be held up in
comparison to an experienced NCO, yes - that “ sly border
fox “. Granted, maybe Heimann did have a better solution to
that border problem but troubling that the Commander should
make a point of it, particularly on the very first day. All
well and good for the CO to miss Heimann, but he was soon to
depart, Bendix was the replacement. And what would Heimann
make of all of this, how would he feel if the situation were
reversed? Unsure of
how to proceed, Bendix probed for a few answers, “ This
Heimann, quite the experienced NCO, was he with the platoon
very long?”
The major
nodded, “ Here for a long time?! He’s been here since the
whole thing began! I’m not sure anyone can recall this part
of the border without him.” He paused then, a look of
concern clouded his face. “ We’ll talk it over Lt. , you
see, it’s difficult to say ‘ so long ‘ to a trooper like
that. “
Bendix was
silent as the Major motioned him on, further questions
seemed pointless. They proceeded silently along dangerous
trails.
After a
while, Stedler cleared his throat as if addressing a crowd,
“ When it comes to Heimann, it was almost like a lucky
charm, nothing bad ever happened up here - he was really the
heart and soul of the operation, an advisor and a friend to
me - almost a mother to the youngest soldiers getting off
the truck for the first time. His voice trailed off at
the end.
“
Commander, I beg your pardon, I had no idea … “, Bendix
stopped, he really had no idea how to end the sentence.
“ Spare me
the condolences Lieutenant. “ the commander flatly said. “
There are orders and Heimann is a soldier. Had I my way, he
would have remained here for sometime to come. A cold
breeze swept thru the woods.
Bendix
began to respond but held his words, through his mind, an
orderly progression of thoughts. Yes - Heimann is soldier,
just like the rest of us. Orders are orders and we all
obey. He - Bendix - was ordered to take command of the
platoon and would do so to the best of his ability, maybe
for more than a few years and then, he would be the old
timer and he would be replaced by another young man. And
yes - it was a bit of bad luck that Heimann was held in such
esteem, certainly he earned the honors - but there is always
a way through - even the Major had said that even the worst
situation on the border can be salvaged. These next few
weeks are not going to be easy - Bendix thought to himself -
and then there’s the question of …
The Major
interrupted the stream of thought, “ You have about one
month to get to know things, the people, procedures and then
take command of the platoon. Use this time well and pick
the brain of Heimann. On 1 November, he is promoted to
Senior Sergeant and then, you are on your own. “
Bendix
replied, “ I know it will not be easy, the platoon is so
familiar with his way and …“
The
Commander - abruptly, It is always been that way in
every platoon! Heimann had a style, everyone knew it and it
led to the honors we all know so well. “
The words,
“ Heimann had a style “, rang in his ears. It seemed one
could not separate the idea of the platoon and Heimann yet
clearly this was coming to an end. Again the thoughts ran
thru his mind - how could he ever lift the platoon to a
higher level - but this was clearly the expectation.
Bendix
could not think of a way to continue the discussion. The
Major, sensing the conversation had not gone as intended,
turned to the Lieutenant, bent down and picked up something
from the trail. He showed it to Bendix.
Major Stedler
“OK.
That’s a pebble“ Bendix said flatly.
“Yes, the Major replied, “ They all look about alike … how do you
suppose they get that way? “
The Lt.
couldn’t figure where the Major was going, They are
weathered by the sun, wind and rain. “ he replied,
assuming his boss was trying to make some sort of point but
discussions of philosophy had never been his strength.
Stedler
continued, “Yup, quite correct and all done over a period
of time and time is the key factor.“
Time is
the key factor - but to what ends thought Bendix?
“It is
long and continues process, the pebble is pushed and pulled
- back and forth.”
Was the
major making a point about Heimann, this was all so very
unclear,
“But a
man is not a pebble in the field … “ Bendix said.
“Exactly!!“ said Stedler, “ look - over the course of one’s
life, a man comes to appear a certain way - true enough -
but there is also an inner self and I think this is much
more important than the outward appearance. He saw that Bendix still wasn’t seeing the larger point. “ For example,
‘ he continued with a laugh, when someone is chasing
after a bride, there are a lot of things you may like, but
isn’t a key factor - who she is - inside? With that,
the Major pitched the pebble into the woods with an
exaggerated gesture.
All of
this curious philosophy, Bendix thought, but a part of it
began to make some sense. One can be like a stone, tossed
by the elements and persist or, on the other hand, simply be
ground into dust. But was it all just a matter of luck?
The Major
held back a low hanging branch as the pair passed. “Young
Lieutenant, only you can find a way with Heimann, I can’t do
it for you and neither can the platoon members. Take a
careful look at who he appears to be and then look again at
who he really is. If you can do this successfully, then you
stand a good chance to learn from the relationship. You are
the officer, he is the experienced NCO - you are new,
everyone knows and respects him, you are the unknown - I
know there is great good in Heimann - I feel there is great
good in you also - what is at hand is to quickly join all of
this together.”
Stadler
noticed that Bendix was still considering the conversation.
With a sly smile he said, “ I certainly do hope your mood
improves as you become one of the comrades and please don’t
be as silent as a stone or as tossed as that pebble. “ Then
more seriously but in a good natured way, “ Come on then!
The two of us have a lot of work to do! “ They emerged from
the difficult part of the trail, the fall sun streamed
warmly thru the trees and the walking was suddenly much
easier.
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